Politixia
Announcement
TALLAHASSEE (The Borowitz Report)—Facing backlash from Republican donors, Ron DeSantis has abruptly ended his feud with Disney and launched a scorched-earth campaign against the Smurfs.
Announcement
Harland Dorrinson, DeSantis’s top political aide, called the Florida governor’s pivot to the Smurfs a “strategic masterstroke.”
“Ron has the anti-Smurf lane all to himself,” he said.
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In a major policy speech, DeSantis accused the Smurfs of spreading a message of “blue supremacy” and vowed to ban the teaching of Smurf studies from his state’s schools.
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“Florida is where Smurfs come to die,” he declared.
Announcement
