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Musk Compound Map
BUILT-IN RADIO: LETS COACHES FEED PLAYERS CORRECT RESPONSES TO CONCUSSION QUESTIONNAIRE
TITANIUM FACE MASK: PREVENTS TEAMMATES FROM EATING EACH OTHER
SLEEVES: KEEP PLAYERS MODEST IN THE EYES OF THE LORD
MICROSCOPIC “END RACISM” PATCH
VENTILATED PANELS: KEEP NIPPLES COOL AND ERECT
CHEST-MOUNTED AIRBAG: DEPLOYS AFTER EVERY HIT
FLARE GUN: IN CASE PLAYER IS LOST AT THE BOTTOM OF PILEUP
SENSOR-EMBEDDED JOCKSTRAP: TRANSMITS REAL-TIME DATA ON GENITAL VELOCITY
AI-POWERED PANTS: MONITOR PLAYER’S LEGS TO ENSURE LIMBS STILL ATTACHED
ADAPTIVE STUDS: PROVIDE CONSISTENT GRIP WHETHER RUNNING, PIVOTING, PRANCING, FROLICKING, TWIRLING, OR CAPERING
RED CIRCLE: INDICATES WHICH PLAYER CURRENTLY SELECTED
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